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#23 The Aubergine.

So it was that long weekend. The long weekend that I had suggested to Pingu to go out and visit him in Australia.













But, he had come up with 'I'm sorry I might be doing something with my friends that weekend'. Bye Felicia. So my girl friends decided to all escape the country and seek out adventures outside of the Oasis and I decided to stay. I'm not going to lie, I hoped that Pingu might show up on my door but I had fun cooking, gymming, tanning blah blah blah. A bit of self love instead.


I was still on the old Tinder at this point. Thursday evening, I was sat in my knickers, a baggy top, no make up, watching a movie and swiping away. I swiped right on this delicious looking guy. We had mutual friends (because they featured in some of his pictures). Muscles, tats, cheeky face and quite clearly a big package. I was like shit... the shorts... they revealed everything.


We matched and got talking straight away. He was cheeky and flirting and I enjoyed the chat. Next we were following each other on insta and then he was persuading me to go out and have some food. It was 8.30pm at night.


Now like most girls, I like to be a granny. So on nights in, I am in. But the spontaneity of it was kinda exciting and it wouldn't take me long to get ready and head out. So I did. We met in a popular area in the Oasis, went for frozen yoghurt (not ice cream but close) and sat on the beach, eating and talking.


He was fascinating, this real energy for life. He nearly lost his foot in Iceland because he stood in cold water, he had been in a car accident and had shoulder injuries and when he was 18 he had a brain tumor. I mean it was ridiculous but he was so cool about it and so damn sexy telling me with his Brazilian accent. Ugh yummy! There was just something about him.


I knew that by the end of the night he would be fucking me. I just didn't know where. We sat and talked for hours. It was close to midnight sat on the beach and I gave him this look and he knew where I was at. We kissed and it was good although his tongue was huge and thick. Is that weird? It sounds weird but the kissing was good. So we got in my car and went back to his place. We went to get ingredients for drinks and got back to his where he started making them... but I couldn't keep my hands off him and I hadn't even had a drink yet.


The next thing he was carrying me to his room and started undressing me and himself. It was the biggest aubergine I have ever seen. It was HUGE! My face must have been a picture. (How the heck is that going to fit?!) We had sore sex all night. I couldn't cope. It was sore and we both wanted it so bad but couldn't do it.


The next morning lying there just chatting, he said "I think you know my ex". I knew her vaguely and yes, we followed each other on the gram. As far as my experience went, she was lovely but slightly dramatic. "If we are admitting shit like this, I should probably tell you that I've matched with two of your housemates". Because I had.


I left with a hickey on my neck. Haven't had one of those for a while. Yes, the girls noticed it at work when we returned from the long weekend, within 5 minutes. Anyways, would you believe it, his room mate who I had matched with started chatting to me on Tinder later that afternoon. Like really? Boys.


 

We kept in touch, the banter was good. He sent sexy Brazilian voice notes that made me excited for his large aubergine. So we arranged go swimming in the sea one evening, I was actually really looking forward to it until I hadn't heard from him the whole day that it had me stressing out. My boss. That's right, my boss was like seriously calm down. If this is meant to be fun then treat it like fun, you're acting like a jealous girlfriend.


Nothing more has struck home than those words. So I bailed. Because I wanted to, I had decided that I'd rather spend time alone than with him that night. I cannot tell you the attentiveness following that and my attitude totally changed to realize that the hard chase is actually fun and way better when you aren't looking for anything serious. So what did I end up doing on this evening? I watched movies on my sofa, in my underwear all evening without my phone.


P: "Why did you cancel on me then?"


H: "Oh a friend in need, needed me. Sisters before misters."



The fact I had bailed on him for a friend, really drove something in him. And me bailing for me, really drove something in me too.


He was on to me constantly. So we arranged that he come to mine the following weekend. Luckily I was better prepared in the sense that my vajayjay had already experienced the wrath of Pedro. The sex was unreal. Apart from when he stuck his tongue in my ear. Gross. But it was just so hot! He was rugged. In fact, I made the mistake of wearing a pony tail and he pulled my hair so hard that it actually bruised my head.


 

He was about to go away for three weeks for work but we continued to chat. He was in the Netherlands. Loved to tell me about how some of clients thought he was fit and I think he was looking for my jealousy but he didn't get it. I did however admit that he was fit. He was. So sexy.


He headed to Wimbledon and was wishing I was there and next year, we should go. I was floored. I couldn't believe that my change in attitude had given that affect and man, I considered myself so much more casual than I had ever been before. It was glorious. (If you haven't tried it, try it).


This is not the end of the aubergine, this story is to be continued...



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